Entries in 'Blog'

ADD GEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

January 18th 2010

how many times do i have to say this?!?!

if your hips are bouncing up and down on your saddle…. you don’t have enough resistance on that bike!!!!!

this is what you look like.

more gear please.

heavy hearts for haiti

January 13th 2010

I measure every grief…

I measure every grief I meet
With analytic eyes;
I wonder if it weighs like mine,
Or has an easier size.

I wonder if they bore it long,
Or did it just begin?
I could not tell the date of mine,
It feels so old a pain.

I wonder if it hurts to live,
And if they have to try,
And whether, could they choose between,
They would not rather die.

I wonder if when years have piled–
Some thousands–on the cause
Of early hurt, if such a lapse
Could give them any pause;

Or would they go on aching still
Through centuries above,
Enlightened to a larger pain
By contrast with the love.

The grieved are many, I am told;
The reason deeper lies,–
Death is but one and comes but once
And only nails the eyes.

There’s grief of want, and grief of cold,–
A sort they call ‘despair,’
There’s banishment from native eyes,
In sight of native air.

And though I may not guess the kind
Correctly yet to me
A piercing comfort it affords
In passing Calvary,

To note the fashions of the cross
Of those that stand alone
Still fascinated to presume
That some are like my own.

– Emily Dickinson

let me hear ya body talk!!!

January 12th 2010

you ever feel like class is just one giant, pink, bubble gum blowing party?

you sure you’re working to your edge? or are you going through the motions, moving in the same “direction” as everyone else, but while their legs, abs, and arms are shaking like amy winehouse needing her noontime fix, you’re cruising like the newest bachelorette in a hot tub full of loot gentleman callers.

your time and money are precious. make every single second count. LISTEN to your teacher. what does he/she want you to change/intensify/move? when i’m teaching i’m calling out cues because i see something/someone that needs correcting. obviously, if it’s dangerous i will personally correct them. and if they just don’t get my 20th heels together, toes apart message, i will come and make it happen physically for them.

when i take class, i ALWAYS assume the instructor is focused on me and my form (i’m THAT insecure i’m doing things wrong and don’t belong). paying attention to every prompt makes for a much stronger, efficient workout. which translates into RESULTS!!!! ding!! ding!! ding!!! ding!!! ding!!!

what are your favorite classes to take?

click image for source

oh no she didn’t

January 7th 2010

here i’ve been preaching the virtues of nutrition, eating only when you’re hungry, new year’s resolutions and starting new healthy habits: blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.  don’t you just want to punch me in my perky mouth!!? well here we are, not even a week into the newest decade, and boy do i have a meltdown to share with you.

i knew at 2am when i couldn’t sleep that things were already going in a sour direction. my alarm was set for 4am, i couldn’t decide whether to just get up or try for more much needed sleep, so i played a 90 minute game of should i stay or should i go. deciding to stay, i then spent the next 30 minutes pissed off that i couldn’t get that terrible clash song out of my head. with my dinky sleep and bad british punk rock on my brain i armed myself with the first of MANY pots of coffee. immediately i started playing another game where i count down how many hours before i get to go to sleep again. i am cranky and starting to grow fangs and a tail.

i suck it up and come through. my students and clients cheer me up, and keep me going the whole morning and afternoon long. five classes, 4 more coffees down and i finally get my first break. i’m cooked. toast. done. does anyone have a thesaurus,  so i can add another word for fried? and i still have 4 more hours to go.

i steal over to barnes & noble to buy 2 cookbooks (but really who am i kidding), and hopefully something quick to eat before my next clients. i purchase my books (bought solely because they’ll look pretty on my kitchen counter), and i head into the b & n starbucks. no, not the food court where i can get a salad, soup or sandwich. hell, no!  why would i do that when they only serve stuffed, greasy pretzels and cheesecake factory pastries at the special starbucks? why would i fuel my tired, starving, dehydrated body with protein, complex carbs, and fiber which would make me feel so much better for the next four hours? when instead i can mouth cram a giant pizza stuffed pretzel (that i’m pretty sure was from 2008), a peppermint crunch bar (that i KNOW was in the case way before christmas), and a sugar cookie the size of my prius???

why? because more than anything i was tired. the thought of having to exercise and motivate was stressing me out. 10 sugar cookies weren’t going to take away that fatigue, nor were they going to miraculously clear the rest of my schedule. at the time i didn’t care.  i just wanted to feel better. quickly. i did for about 4 minutes. then i felt like this:

look at me. face down in the ground. toppled over with sugar and trans fats. i thought i was tired before……good grief i had to take the escalator out.  i wobbled like a drunken sailor…..drunken sailor-slash-panda bear. now.

the thing is i know when it comes down to teaching and training i’m always good to go. i’ve never fallen asleep in a class or during a session. i get so motivated by everyone else the adrenaline just flows, and i’m ready to dance party for hours.

for me i have to be careful of telling myself stories that aren’t true. in this case, i was stressed out that i was going to be too tired to perform for the rest of my day. that anxiety of an unactualized event caused me to sabotage myself (eating wise), and thus feel EVEN worse in the end.

so now i just sit here looking through these blinds feeling sick and bloated. i will not try to “make up” for my starbucks party. i’ll eat what i’m hungry for next time i feel hungry. if it’s a peppermint crunch bar i’m craving then damn straight that’s what i’ll eat. the worst thing i could do right now is start denying my body even more of what it needs or wants. and in all honesty that bar tasted like a toothpaste flavored roll of toilet paper.

click images for source


Development by Brandi Bernoskie